It really is nothing to do with being loved by another.
It is the act of loving the other. In the only way we know how.
With the only person we automatically know how to.
From Heal Your Heart – A Journey to Find Your SoulMate
When you complete this chapter you will be able to:
• Freely connect, feel and share with your Soul Mate via thought and energy
• Know how close you are to physically connecting with your Soul Mate
Note: This chapter is from the later part of the workbook, when you have already healed and released all relationship and love issues,emotional scars, beliefs, and much more…
This poem is the story of when the two halves, who have been dancing with love energy for some time, come together in the physical, to meet and greet each’s representation of their spirit essence. And fall in love all over again.
A smile caresses my little finger and I feel love.
A hand reaches out to mould itself
into the contours of mine.
Warmth surrounds and hugs my entire being.
My mind takes a snapshot, to remember and
treasure these incredible eyes I see before me.
Shoulders tremble as my fingertips slide along,
then down each arm.
Hands intertwine and dance.
A back flexes in readiness for each kiss
it wishes to be smothered with.
A chest cries out to be stroked.
A neck stretches upwards in anticipation.
I close my eyes as my hands explore your face.
Your love radiates and you are recognized.
I smile and the tears flow.
The eternity of waiting is over.
We are reunited.
My chest feels heavy,
my heart pounds and my spirit flies.
Oh I do so love this beautiful expression
of your essence of spirit.
Created so I may share my love for you in the flesh.
As one, we were spirit flying through the heavens. As one we lived as pure eternal love. As one we shared and experienced as it can be with no other. We were one. To feel and know and share and open to all we thought and felt. As if two hearts, two minds, two spirits living as one.
Then we separated, becoming two. And from that moment onwards, we searched for the other. We kept searching for that missing part of ourselves. We search to become whole again.
When we separated, we began the experience of masculine and feminine. Each taking that aspect of the whole into the world of the physical. To experiment, and experience, and play with, and learn all that role entailed.
We have undertaken countless life experiences, walked from every perspective, felt every emotion. Bar one. The matching of gender perspective, which the other part of ourselves has.
We have tried to find our perfect match, to bring all that we now have back to the one. To fulfill the expression of our gender. Only becoming whole again when the same two halves come back together.
How can you find satisfaction in expression of your maleness with any other woman? I am the only one who has the matching piece. How can I find the love I seek? You are the only one who knows of it.
Yes, we have crossed paths and shared with many soul family members. Each holding one piece of the missing one. Each encounter has been a delightful experience. Each piece as a reminder of what we seek.
One that mirrored your laughter, another your kindness, another your compassion, and yet another your spunk. Occasionally I saw glimpses of your personality and knowing, in the way they behaved.
Yet none were you and I kept searching. All the while increasing my knowing of exactly what you would be like. You see, every single one did remind me of one particular part of you. As I traveled, I learned what aspects make me smile from the inside out, and which I have no interest in. Continually clarifying and defining what my perfect match would have.
In my journey of discovery, you were built piece by piece in my mind and heart. As I have been in yours.
I have learned much about men. Those dear sweet souls that they are. So easy to please.
It seems the sexes are very misunderstood by each other. We carry our hurts, fears and the beliefs they created, relating them to each and every male of the species.
We grow up with distant, condemning, perhaps even abusive fathers. Partners who further cement our beliefs. Then we go about blaming all men, viewing them all in the same light.
Just as men perhaps grow up with smothering, nasty and uncaring mothers. Reflected in their relationships also. All we need do is listen to the intent in sex jokes to see their impact.
How can any of us expect to be able to have a worthwhile, open and loving relationship until we locate and heal these beliefs, develop our own beliefs of the opposite sex, then go into the world and experience that to create understanding?
So think carefully of your beliefs. Listen to how you feel about the opposite sex in general. It is not merely related to finding the right person. It is what you believe of the species as a whole.
While having a conversation with a dear soul mate recently, keys to the matching game became apparent.
Men and women are predisposed to certain behaviors, which when experienced freely and fully, create deep happiness from within. They are a part of us we crave to express. In order for this to be possible, a mate must match with the appropriate responses.
All men wish to do is make women happy. Every woman. A very simple task, yet often not accomplished.
You can verify this easily. Next time a man holds a door open for you, gives you right of way, says good day, or passes along a simple smile. Know he does so just to make you smile and feel good. Return the smile with a thank-you for his kindness, and watch his face light up with happiness, at having made you happy.
That really is all there is to it. Watch the acts of kindness increase in line with your increased receptiveness and acknowledgments.
No, this is not about seeking attention, or tricking men into behaviors. Instead, it is allowing them to act how they naturally wish to, by simply responding with acknowledgement for their intent.
How often do you take care in your behaviors with your partner, then sigh at the lack of response? So you know what I speak of.
Men wish to ‘please’ their partners, and women wish their men to ‘want’ to please them.
How ironic is that? Each matches the other’s wants precisely, yet how rarely do we experience it?
Whenever your partner undertakes any giving action towards you, validate and respond. All it takes is a warm smile, which is easy now we know their intent. To make us smile.
You will see very quickly, that as soon as he sees any hint of giving you pleasure, he increases his efforts. Actually this continues in direct proportion with receiving the appropriate response. That his actions do make you happy.
The more a man feels his efforts achieve their intent, the more excited and active he becomes. And the more we experience that he ‘wants’ to make us happy.
It is his desire to make us happy, not ours. So we have no responsibility in repaying in kind, other than accepting and appreciating. Which we naturally do anyway.
Once a man also realizes his mates desire to know he wants to attend to her, the circumstance becomes even more free and easy.
In the same way women can have their needs met by welcoming their mates attempts, men can do likewise. Whatever your mate does for you, recognize and smile. Know the specific intent is to give to you.
Then you will delight in becoming more in tune to noticing them, and the other in the giving.
Women often desire affection, as their way of expressing love. What better way for a man to live his desire to be held and nurtured, than welcoming his mate doing so?
It really is all in becoming aware and responding.
People give to each other because they want to, not because they have to. What a lovely way to show how much they care.
There is a group of seemingly innate desires of expression for men and women. The ones that make a man feel manly, and a woman feminine. The following are but mere suggestions for you to ponder. It appears the list is to be discovered by exploration with our mates.
Such as a man being the protector and provider, and the woman the nurturer and gentle one. Men are naturally physically strong and women emotionally strong. Men love to do and women feel.
Each sex has an innate need to express the compatible aspect of the other, one of the greatest pleasures experienced during my dance of love. I opened and expressed freely and openly for the first time in my life. No thought was involved prior or during. It was pure action and reaction.
What made it special was that my partner for the dance delighted in my actions as much as I did in his. Each gave what the other had been craving, so the sensation of our behavior being welcomed added greatly to the experience.
Everything we think of doing, is exactly what our partners desire us to do, when we dance with love. That is the way of it. If they were not compatible we would not even think of them, as often we are hearing their wishes.
So relax next time you think of doing something different or unusual. If it is what you desire to express as a natural part of you, go for it.
Our memories have been buried for a long time and may need jolting. I still remember how one soul mate came up behind and put his arms around me a certain way. He had to catch me as I fell with the shock of the memory returning. I had no idea until that moment.
Many, many times I have wondered at how very similar each mate is. Same likes, dislikes, oddities, habits, hobbies, even sleeping positions. They are after all one in the same, merely different aspects of the one.
When we are free to be and express each and every natural urge as it surfaces, and that act is recognized and welcomed by our mate, the inner excitement peaks. Free and full expression of self is one almighty experience. Love at being self.
The acts we so desire to express are all aimed at giving, nothing to do with personal gratification. Each is our natural way of expressing our love experience towards them.
It really is nothing to do with being loved BY another. It is the act OF loving the other. In the only way we know how. With the only person we automatically know how to.
Something I must clarify here. When I speak of expressing natural urges and desires, and of love, I am not speaking of sex. I am speaking about the experience of opening to our own love energy, connecting and combining that with another’s love energy, and expressing it in whatever way comes to mind. Whether it is acts of kindness and care, a smile, sharing an event or experience, romance, touch, or sex. It is the act of combining with another dear one that creates the joy, not what we do.
The reuniting of the two in becoming one again is a very special event, beginning well before physical interaction occurs. In dreams, thoughts, visions, chance meetings. The shift between it being a purely spiritual connection to include a physical one is gradual.
My first recognition of connecting with my one soul mate came nearly 6 months ago. It was a beautiful vision/dream, while I was half awake yet half asleep. We spoke and shared, his gentleness and care overwhelmed me with love.
Since that time I find myself opening to him more each time, and today fully and completely. I was napping when verse came instantly to me. Words describing experience as I was experiencing it.
The poem that heads this section is not merely thoughts or feelings, wants and desires. It is that experience I floated in today. With him. Perhaps they are his words, I do not know.
You see, people who long and ache for their one soul mate have not opened to their realization yet. We are always connected with these beings, they are our other half so how could we not be?
How can we miss and ache for something we have. To do so is to not know or believe in their existence, their possibility. How can we hope to reunite with something we do not believe exists?
What we do miss is allowing ourselves to have what is right before us, love and connection with our other half.
To consciously feel and build our connection, is to work with hope and inspiration. We know and feel our future with them, so now is the time to prepare. To complete the necessary healing and learning, establish and organize our physical lives, remove all obstacles to this becoming. Get ready.
There is more to the rejoining of the two as one, in relationship to how each carries half the whole. They have gone forth to experience and learn as that individual, to bring back and share.
The journey of reconnecting is a most enjoyable one. Of sharing and learning and discovering the experience of incorporating the missing aspect of ourselves.
Each pair may approach it differently, dependant on their desires for the relationship. For me personally, I intend to explore it to the limits, go beyond all imaginable. I know this possibility is only limited by our intent and belief.
So go dream of your magical love adventure. Dream of all you desire within it. Call forth your one soul mate (with words or in your mind), open your heart and talk to him/her. Share your name, where you are, your intent. Tell them to get ready as you are. Open and begin the conscious connection so it may grow and be enjoyed.
Activity – You Know What To Do
This chapter is filled with topics and ideas to be explored. And you are quite capable of listening and guiding yourself through it perfectly. (readers would know to use the Greene’s Release technique to resolve any issues or triggers that arise from this chapter)
It is time for you to take full control of your own creation of Love. Enjoy knowing of and feeling your strength.
When you are finished working with this chapter, stop and take a look at how far you have come on your journey, what you have achieved and the different person you have become. Take notice and congratulate yourself.
Thoughts to Ponder & Write About
• Open and share an intimate experience with your Soul Mate.
• Write a story or poem about it.
• Think about the similarities of all the men/women you have crossed paths with.
• Become aware of the picture you have been building of your Soul Mate and how each man/woman you meet mirrors some aspect of that.
• Explore the characteristics of both sexes.
Observe friends, relatives, people on the street. Notice their natural responses.
• Heal your beliefs of your own and the opposite sex.
• Think about the actions you long to express with a partner.
Experience them in dreamtime.
• Do you still feel a craving to be loved by another, if so feel and heal it.
• Are you ready to just love another person freely. Feel and experience that.
